greenighs

greenighs is a narcoleptic insomniac, well known in her community for her selfless devotion to rearranging the lawn ornaments in neighbors' gardens to recreate historic battles of the French and Indian war. She was once cited as the single most evasive respondant to a random telephone mortgage survey. greenighs is beloved of small children and reptiles, and can both sing and play the harmonica, often at the same time. Her advice on interior decorating is sought after by the blind and elderly alike, and no local barbeque is complete without her famous Acorn Squash and Peeky-Toe Crab Chipotle Almondine. She once held a World Record for retaining unanswered mail. Her collection of hotel shower caps is second only to her array of corporate values wallet cards in both scope and density. She has often been credited for inspiring the invention of the the Spork. greenighs knows her shoe size in US, UK, and European denominations. She has never worn a derby. greenighs is available for motivational speaking engagements and bachelor parties. Serious inquiries only.